Hope. I need hope, every single moment. For to be hopeless is the worst torture possible. Indeed hopelessness is Hell, and what makes Hell the worst torture. But if I have hope, then I know that all pain is temporary, and torture is bearable.
I have hope. Wow. What statement could be more vulnerable than that? I feel naked just saying it. There is something inscrutably powerful there. As if I just let go of all the circumstances, all logic, what seems realistic, and fell into the hands of God, at His mercy, hoping He’ll catch me, trusting those hands are loving.
It’s not “I hope He’ll catch me”; it’s “I have hope that He’ll catch me.”
[21314, written with left hand at Abbey of Gethsemani]